Unlucky for some, as you might believe, but these 13 reasons all serve an equally crucial thing in common.

They are all reasons you should walk away from a relationship.

Tolerating certain kinds of treatment is what is going to put you into a pit of low self-esteem, as well as low standards.

The toleration of bad treatment will lead to the toleration of worse to come.

Trust me when I say that the first red flag you see, will not be the last.

Relationships…

You meet somebody.

You like them.

You date them.

As you’re dating them, you get to know them.

That’s when you’ll start to see the good and the bad.

The good is great, but the bad should be where you say – no more!

Too many problems occur from bad relationships, and often they are a sign that another generation who has witnessed abuse, is now going through it themselves. 

Setting The Bar Low

The bar is always going to be low for people who have been previously abused or mistreated.

It’s a cruel world when you enter a familiar pattern, and just because you recognize it, you stay put.

Familiarity isn’t always positive, and it isn’t always good for your well being. 

That’s why I’m here today – to show you what you can’t tolerate. If there’s one thing I’m sure of, you can differentiate. 

And after this, you will be able to do that much better. 

Never Tolerate These 13 Things In Any Relationship

Hard as it may be, what’s harder is tolerating any of these points on a long-term basis. 

#1 Complacency

Complacency sounds inoffensive, doesn’t it? How can nothing be dangerous? How can sitting back be so detrimental?

Relationships only succeed if both parties are consciously switched on, and are both willing to put one foot in front of the other to make it work.

It does involve doing, and complacency takes all of that away.

No couple should be plodding from one day to the next with nothing to show for it. 

This is called a waste of a life. 

#2 The Refusal To Work Together

Running over the same arguments will tell you that the root problem is never being resolved.

What’s the point in being together if those roots can’t be pulled out of the soil?

You’ve got to be able to work together if you want to stay together, and the refusal to do so is a huge red flag. 

#3 Cheating

If you know your man is cheating and you are staying with him, then what are you even doing?

Where are your standards? Are you staying because you feel you don’t deserve any better?

Let me tell you, if you are allowing your man to get away with it, he’s never going to stop.

He will keep his options wide open, and act on impulse because he knows he can. 

Never put up with somebody who doesn’t value loyalty and exclusivity. 

#4 Hitting/Punching/Pushing

I don’t need to explain this, do I?

In case I do – any physical violence should be your cue to pick up your bag and walk out the door.

There is no excuse, and there is definitely no toleration for such abuse.

Men who exert their physical power over anybody, let alone the woman they’re supposed to be in a relationship with, should be avoided at all costs, and if you need to, go to the police.

#5 Control

Why would any man who claims to love you also want to control what you do, what you say, where you go, what you wear, how you act…?

There’s only one reason why a man would possibly want to gain control over the woman they’re dating,

and that would be that they’re some kind of narcissist who gets off on seeing you become less and less of a person as time goes on.

Understand the signs early on, and you will have enough time to leave without much taken from your identity. Leave it too long, and it will be a lot harder. 

#6 Manipulation

If you’re being manipulated into thinking or believing certain things in your relationship, there’s no hope to see a happy ending. 

I know it might feel like that will change.

Maybe your man will see the light of day.

Perhaps they will have a personal epiphany where they realize the mistakes they’ve made…

…It won’t happen. 

Manipulation equals danger. So do not tolerate it. 

#7 Intimidation

Intimidation can be physical, emotional, sexual, financial; however your man displays it.

Ultimately, its consequences are that you are left scared or fearful of some kind of repercussion. 

Is any relationship worth sticking around for after something like that?

No. 

#8 Not Knowing What “No” Means

No is a sentence. And I’m sure you’ve heard that before, but have you really heard it?

Understand it, and use it as currency, because it definitely has worth.

If your partner doesn’t understand no, then perhaps they will understand you leaving. 

#9 Forgetting Important Dates

Dates are so important, and I am not just talking about birthdays or anniversaries.

If you have a doctor appointment, or you have a big interview – you want your partner to remember. 

There’s no excuse to be so lax on these kinds of matters, but if you are loved, then the dates that make up your day-to-day life should be remembered. 

#10 Bringing You Down

If your partner is bringing you down, you have to jump ship before you sink to the bottom of the ocean. 

Trust me please, when I say this:

It won’t get better. It isn’t going to change. People who bring you down are only after one thing – ensuring your misery is alive and kicking. 

#11 Criticizing You

A highly critical person is aligned with the personality of a narcissist – and all narcissists should be avoided like the plague. 

Why should you be criticized, anyway? There’s only one reason somebody might do that, and that would be to kill your confidence.

Nope!

Bye!

#12 Laziness

Get off your butt and do something!

I thought you promised we would take a walk this weekend?

Why didn’t you clear the kitchen? You know I was working all day and you’ve been home doing nothing.

Is that what you want? Are these the questions you want to ask your partner?

Don’t tolerate such ignorance. Laziness makes room for anger and resentment, and over the years that’s only going to grow. 

#13 Refusal To Pay His Way

So you’re the one who earns the most.

You might work all the hours under the sun to pay your rent or bills, and your partner may work a few hours a week. The money they get goes on beer or computer games. 

They love you because you pay for everything, but what’s in it for you?

Nothing.

You definitely shouldn’t be tolerating such childish behavior. 

A Person Meant For You Will Do These 3 Things!

In life, we all want to know that the person we’re with is meant for us.

Nobody wants to waste their time building a foundation that’s only destined to be knocked down.

We don’t have that kind of energy.

Do you remember a situation where you felt this?

To see a person before you who you wanted it all to work out with. What a beautiful thing.

If you want clarity, three things you need to look out for to ensure you know a person is good for you have been carefully crafted by me.

I don’t want to talk about money. I don’t want to talk about promises.

I don’t want roses, or chocolates, or a movie date. (Well, the chocolates I … No…. Forget it).

Kissing Too Many Frogs

Some might see the fun in kissing frogs, but others not so much.

What do you think about it? Putting yourself out there and searching for

The One is not as easy as the movies make it. 

There’s usually no meeting up the top of the Empire State Building,

and no meet cute where doves are released and a nice soothing song is playing in the background. 

When you do meet that one meant for you, it will be confirmed only in time, and you have to trust time as a process in general. 

Needing to Raise The Bar

So with all those frogs you have kissed, there has to be a time you meet the prince or princess. 

As we all look for various traits in a person, it’s equally imperative to ensure they match with you in terms of values and morals, too.

So the following three things will be where you start in defining your forever with somebody. 

Let your one true love reveal themselves…. now!

These 3 Things Will Reveal A Person is Meant For You

#1 Connection

The big one.

Connection.

There’s little to no point in attempting a relationship with a person you don’t ‘feel.’ 

Tell me now through the power of thought teleportation that you have tried this.

Some of you may have even really convinced yourself that this one particular person has it all.

The wondrous way they make you feel, the way they make you laugh, the sex.

But what about when all of that is taken away? What is there left? 

Connection is when two people feel drawn to each other, and use that as the center of where everything else grows.

You consciously want to be together, and like moths to a flame, you were drawn to one another for more reasons than just those that scratch the surface. 

Connections can look like:

• How you communicate
• Allowing each other to be vulnerable
• Expressing gratitude; being grateful for the little things
• Kissing or hugging
• Conscious respect and trust

Some things go a really long way.

If you’re looking for a person who is meant for you, you need to look out for a connection that lasts, and not one meant to wither away quickly. 

It is in the permanence of connection you will see the permanence of love. 

#2 Want To Understand You

What does understanding mean to you?

I’ll give you an example.

Sally had a hard childhood, where one parent was incredibly overprotective, and the other was abusive.

She constantly felt batted between neglect and coddled.

Most days were filled with an underlying anxiety of, “What’s going to happen today? What mood will my dad be in?”

Some of those moods consisted of coming home from work with candy for her, and hearing from him that she is the light of his life.

Other days, he wouldn’t even speak to her. If she tried to engage, he would shout and criticize. 

Sally grew up wanting to make a change in her life, but never really knowing or having the tools to do so.

As time went on, she knew she wanted to meet somebody the opposite of her father. 

Sally met Robert, who was a quiet man. He sometimes struggled to find the right words, and he was the kind of man who would go about life without the need to brag, or buy the most expensive things.

He was happy, and content with what he had, and he wanted to find somebody special to share it with. 

When Sally met Robert, they enjoyed each other’s company. Over time, Sally told Robert about her childhood, and Robert spoke about his (not perfect for other reasons).

It was a moment of true understanding that connected them further.

This understanding came from Sally listening to what Robert had to say, and for Robert to understand that Sally’s childhood left scars.

Robert didn’t want to re-open those scars. Instead, he wanted to be the person who nurtured them.

He understood that Sally needed support from time to time, or reassurance that helped Sally feel validated. 

This is exactly what I mean by understanding.

The conscious effort to take the person you’re with, and understand that they’re made up of a million tiny pieces.

Life can get complex, and understanding only means finding a person meant for you. 

#3 Let You Be You

Acceptance.

I accept you for you, and you accept me for me.

Nobody is trying to change anybody, and neither person is attempting to manipulate them into losing themselves. 

Isn’t that what life and love is all about? I know for me, that’s where the real magic is. 

When you can authentically be yourself, you remain free to explore what goals and hobbies you have.

You get to hold onto what’s important to you, and what you feel strongly about.

None of it is called into question, or criticized.

This is what I mean when I say somebody is intended for you.

They are in no way displaying any signs of toxicity. They just want to see you happy and enjoy it when you are. 

Settling For Less