In a world where women want to feel more empowered, how can they start to crave out a moral code for themselves?

Well, I think rules are a great place to start. They’re changeable as people change.

They contain boundaries all by themselves. They set a standard for you that no other person can move or touch. 

If you have a daughter, it’s time to start offering them the rules they should live by.

Rules that open doors, close off conflict, and divert them to happiness.

Rules?

It sounds harsh to offer rules out as a parent, doesn’t it?

Do as I say!

This isn’t that. 

Instead, I try to think about rules not as being a bossy parent, but instead a caring parent trying to carve out the best future possible for her. 

Rules can be to take your shoes off when you enter the house. Or make sure you get your homework done before you switch the TV on. 

And they matter, too. The small rules make for the healthy routine and lifestyle you should live by, but what about the bigger principles in life?

How are they learned if they’re not taught?

And so, I apply my parental/teacher status, and I teach.

Let’s look at those 13 rules right now. 

No Man Is Your Happy Place

A big one to start with! Kind of a kick in the teeth for those who consistently believe they need a man in order to be complete. 

You don’t!

It’s imperative to me that my daughter knows the only person she truly needs to get to know and love in order to be happy, is herself. 

That’s not to say that love isn’t amazing, and sharing your life with somebody isn’t incredible – but you don’t need that to be happy.

You won’t live in a constant state of misery until you find it.

And so, I teach her that her own company, opinions and beliefs are hers and hers alone. 

She matters.

Happiness Starts With You

Wherever you want your life to go, you have to start with the idea that happiness begins only with you.

The choices my daughter makes will all count toward a future she’s walking toward every single day.

Happiness is never constant, but you will be able to find it a lot easier when you turn inward, instead of looking around you for your next temporary fix.

And yes, external things can make you happy. A day off work and a long bath.

A hike with friends. That new movie you wanted to see. A pay rise. A new haircut.

A promotion. A sunny day. But happiness has roots, and those roots need to come from her, and not that pay rise or sunny day. 

It’s an empowering concept to think that it all begins with  you, but it’s the same for us all.

Daughters look to their parents for advice, support and inspiration.

If you can’t provide that back, then they will go on a gnarly journey to find it themselves. 

Those who do figure this out are the lucky ones. But they can all be lucky if we all lived by these 13 rules. 

Love Them, Even If They’re Broken

Dismissing those who push you away is a mistake made by many.

It’s those people who need love the most, and you can do that from afar. You don’t need to beg them to let you love them.

But keep that love in your heart, and wish those who need it well. 

If a person is broken, your daughter is going to fare much better in still loving them and wanting the best for them.

This teaches her that an open heart is always going to feel better than one that’s closed off.

The World Is Yours

Whatever you want from it can be achieved, and it’s only when you place limitations on somebody that they get used to it.

Parents who put a spiritual roof over their daughter’s heads will never witness them touch the stars. 

How can they, when the ceiling is in the way?

Beauty Is Always Around You

When you stop looking for the beauty in the world, you stop feeling as though you’re a part of it.

Disassociating from your wider home leaves your soul isolated, and far less likely to want to be a part of it.

Your daughter needs to know that she is connected to this universe, and everything it has to offer her. 

Never Let Your Head Drop

Keep your head up even when things aren’t going your way. 

After all – how will you spot your next opportunity if you’re only focusing on the ground below your feet?

Don’t Hurt Where You Can Heal

If you have the choice, always choose healing.

That’s not to say you can’t cry – but crying in itself is a form of healing, isn’t it?

We cry, we feel better, we take that next step.

But healing is intentional, and it’s how we get from one chapter in life to the next.

Cry Without Guilt

Speaking of crying – we must address it in more detail!

Crying is a way of releasing, and why should any daughter of yours feel bad about that? 

Don’t ever let anybody guilt you into drying your tears when all you want to do is let go of whatever it is that’s making you feel sad. 

Sift Through The Idiots To Find The Love You Deserve

And there will be a lot of them! That doesn’t mean you have to strike up a personal relationship with any of them, but to observe an idiot is to check them off your list of potential loves.

And that’s all about putting your wise head on, and spotting what you deem to be inappropriate or just plain idiotic behaviors to find those more endearing and captivating. 

Nothing wrong with that!

Just Because You’re Busy, Doesn’t Mean You’re Successful

We could all pretend to be busy, but being busy doing nothing is just a pretentious way of pretending to have the success you want.

Work out what you want, and work for it. 

Don’t busy yourself unnecessarily. This will only give you time to waste, and energy to burn elsewhere. 

If You Want Something, Your Whole Heart Needs To Jump In

There’s no point in slightly doing something.

When you pick up a book to read, you don’t just read the middle two chapters, do you?

The whole thing will tell the whole story, and your life is your whole story. 

So live it wholly, too. 

Keep Your Voice Loud

A quiet voice gets lost in the smallest of crowds, so it’s important to use it when it matters to you.

Speak when somebody, including you, is being treated unfairly. 

Use it when you spot injustice.

Raise it when you want to fight for something that matters.

Your voice is the only instrument you have that fully represents you. To silence it is to do yourself a complete disservice. 

Fall Three Times, Get Back Up Four

Falling down doesn’t mean you’ve failed. Staying down does. 

Knowing the difference is vital if you want to build resilience and work on your goals.

You can’t do that while sitting on the ground and refusing to get up!

A Person Meant For You Will Do These 3 Things!

In life, we all want to know that the person we’re with is meant for us.

Nobody wants to waste their time building a foundation that’s only destined to be knocked down.

We don’t have that kind of energy.

Do you remember a situation where you felt this?

It is beautiful to see a person before you with whom you wanted it all to work out.

If you want clarity, I have carefully crafted three things you need to look out for to ensure you know a person is good for you.

I don’t want to talk about money. I don’t want to talk about promises.

I don’t want roses, or chocolates, or a movie date. (Well, the chocolates I … No…. Forget it).

Kissing Too Many Frogs

Some might see the fun in kissing frogs, but others not so much.

What do you think about it? Putting yourself out there and searching for

The One is not as easy as the movies make it. 

There’s usually no meeting up the top of the Empire State Building,

and no meet cute where doves are released and a nice soothing song is playing in the background. 

When you do meet that one meant for you, it will be confirmed only in time, and you have to trust time as a process in general. 

Needing to Raise The Bar

So with all those frogs you have kissed, there has to be a time you meet the prince or princess. 

As we all look for various traits in a person, it’s equally imperative to ensure they match with you in terms of values and morals, too.

So the following three things will be where you start in defining your forever with somebody. 

Let your one true love reveal themselves…. now!

These 3 Things Will Reveal A Person is Meant For You

#1 Connection

The big one.

Connection.

There’s little to no point in attempting a relationship with a person you don’t ‘feel.’ 

Tell me now through the power of thought teleportation that you have tried this.

Some of you may have even really convinced yourself that this one particular person has it all.

The wondrous way they make you feel, the way they make you laugh, the sex.

But what about when all of that is taken away? What is there left? 

Connection is when two people feel drawn to each other, and use that as the center of where everything else grows.

You consciously want to be together, and like moths to a flame, you were drawn to one another for more reasons than just those that scratch the surface. 

Connections can look like:

• How you communicate
• Allowing each other to be vulnerable
• Expressing gratitude; being grateful for the little things
• Kissing or hugging
• Conscious respect and trust

Some things go a really long way.

If you’re looking for a person who is meant for you, you need to look out for a connection that lasts, and not one meant to wither away quickly. 

It is in the permanence of connection you will see the permanence of love. 

#2 Want To Understand You

What does understanding mean to you?

I’ll give you an example.

Sally had a hard childhood, where one parent was incredibly overprotective, and the other was abusive.

She constantly felt batted between neglect and coddled.

Most days were filled with an underlying anxiety of, “What’s going to happen today? What mood will my dad be in?”

Some of those moods consisted of coming home from work with candy for her, and hearing from him that she is the light of his life.

Other days, he wouldn’t even speak to her. If she tried to engage, he would shout and criticize. 

Sally grew up wanting to make a change in her life, but never really knowing or having the tools to do so.

As time went on, she knew she wanted to meet somebody the opposite of her father. 

Sally met Robert, who was a quiet man. He sometimes struggled to find the right words, and he was the kind of man who would go about life without the need to brag, or buy the most expensive things.

He was happy, and content with what he had, and he wanted to find somebody special to share it with. 

When Sally met Robert, they enjoyed each other’s company. Over time, Sally told Robert about her childhood, and Robert spoke about his (not perfect for other reasons).

It was a moment of true understanding that connected them further.

This understanding came from Sally listening to what Robert had to say, and for Robert to understand that Sally’s childhood left scars.

Robert didn’t want to re-open those scars. Instead, he wanted to be the person who nurtured them.

He understood that Sally needed support from time to time, or reassurance that helped Sally feel validated. 

This is exactly what I mean by understanding.

The conscious effort to take the person you’re with, and understand that they’re made up of a million tiny pieces.

Life can get complex, and understanding only means finding a person meant for you. 

#3 Let You Be You

Acceptance.

I accept you for you, and you accept me for me.

Nobody is trying to change anybody, and neither person is attempting to manipulate them into losing themselves. 

Isn’t that what life and love is all about? I know for me, that’s where the real magic is. 

When you can authentically be yourself, you remain free to explore what goals and hobbies you have.

You get to hold onto what’s important to you, and what you feel strongly about.

None of it is called into question, or criticized.

This is what I mean when I say somebody is intended for you.

They are in no way displaying any signs of toxicity. They just want to see you happy and enjoy it when you are. 

Settling For Less

Some of you out there may be settling for less. Getting stuck into the habits and routines of ‘good enough for right now.’ 

I wanted to raise these three things as a standard that everybody should set for themselves.

With all three components, you know you’ve found somebody you’re meant to be with, and I feel that’s something we all deserve. 

Too often, these become lost in the fight for short-term attention or temporary gratification. 

No relationship can sustain such shallow waters, so for anything more.

There needs to be more awareness of who you are and the type of person you want to match physically, emotionally, and mentally.